Sadness & tears

Okay so only a few days ago, I was feeling fine. But I guess yesterday I really broke down. I don't exactly know what happened, but I wasn't feeling good all day long, which resulted in a fight with Dennis, right when I thought everything could really be better. So yeah, I screwed up again. But now I did it for real, since it ended, I guess... And today I don't feel much better, and just now I felt like drawing on my computer so I started my tablet up and what happens: Right, the pen doesn't fucking work. So I thought that maybe re-installing would help. So I do that, and it still doesn't fucking work. Then I decided to look on the internet how much a new pen costs, and I find out I can't buy a new pen for my tablet. And yeah, now I'm crying again, but now over such a silly thing. I hate this, I hate everything, I hate life. What does it give you anyway? E-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g hurts and I only hurt everyone around me, that's for sure. I only fuck things up. I just want to cry my fucking eyes out. I fucking hate this, I hate everything, just save me, let me be free... I want to give up, again.