I've totally ruined my life, and now I don't know what to do anymore. I don't have friends who live nearby and sometimes, I'm a total bitch. The only thing I do outside of my house and outside of my school, well, that are my voice lessons. Every day is the same, except for Mondays: school - (voice lessons -) computer - bed - school - (voice lessons -) computer - bed etc. It makes me sad, but I can't blame anyone, I'm the one who ruined my own life and now I just don't know how to get it better.
I think my computer won't work for so much longer anymore. When I turn it on, it doesn't work properly, so then I have to turn it off and then back on again, and I have to do that for about 5 times till it works... And as soon as it doesn't work anymore, I don't want it to get repaired, I'll just have to live without a computer for a few weeks then... And after that, I might buy a laptop. I just don't have a choice, besides, my parents wouldn't pay for it anyway.
I just want to be able to look in the mirror and say "I'm proud of myself", and that I actually mean it. But when I look at myself in the mirror, I only think about how I neglect myself, and how I ruin my life by being behind the computer almost 24/7 and how I have no real friends, who also live close to me, where I can go to when I'm down.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
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